XX As a kit they...
Nightkit and her siblings, Minkkit and Honeykit, were born one late evening on the 13th of November to Fawnpetal and Blackclover in ShadowClan Nursery.
Having two loving and caring parents, and a new leader motivated to bring the clan back up onto it's feet, everything seemed perfect for the kits, with seemingly no reason to worry about their future.
That is, until the kits started opening their eyes. Nightkit had just opened her eyes for the first time, when shortly after, her father disappeared without a trace. This would be the first of many loses, and for Nightshiver mark the beginning of what she'd later consider like a curse.
Despite the absence of a father figure, everything wasn't all bad. Nightkit had fun playing with her siblings, specifically Minkkit who's excitement often made her laugh, and eventually they even got a new sibling: Fennelkit. Her mother had found the abandonned kit, and taken her in.
Things were going alright for a moment, until RiverClan raided their camp, with no resent sign of Honeykit and Fennelkit either. During the raid, some warriors had made their way into the nursery and started a ruckus of arguments and fighting, causing Fawnpetal to cry as she tried to reason with them - Which was a frightening and worrying sight for Nightkit, who had never seen her mother cry before. Soon, due to the fighting in the nursery, they had no choice but to evacuate. Unfortunately, despite Wolfglare trying to help them escape, Nightkit and Minkkit got separated from their mother and found themselves lost among the fighting. Even when Wolfglare came to cover them from the fighting, it remained scary as they heard their mother's calls for them die between the shouts of fighting and had front-row places to watching Icestar loose a life to Lionstar. To Nightkit, it seemed even more unnerving as her normally confident brother seemed to be just as scared as her.
When the fighting finally ended however, Nightkit felt ashamed as she watched her brother, despite how uncharactaristically afraid he'd been, went to comfort their worried mother, whereas she was being comforted by her. That's why Nightkit promised she'd try to be more brave, and to protect them too.
Nightkit was barely three moons at the time of that raid, and it left her rather shaken up for a while.
After the raid, things went back to what could considered to be normal, despite the increase of tension around camp. Nightkit watched as holes got patched up and things fixed, and slowly things seemed to get back to normal. During that time, she even made her first friend: Bluebellkit. They got along quite well, and eventually he'd convinced her to sneak into the apprentice den, where they both fell asleep and got discovered by a warrior, Thistletounge. He gave them a frog (which helped Nightkit discover her disliking of the said food), and send them back on their way to the nursery where they'd apologise to Fawnpetal and with the frog as an apology gift, as instructed by Thistletounge. The whole ordeal caught Minkkit's attention too, which quite excited him, although got reprimanded for saying that sneaking out was cool. A warrior had brought fresh mice for everyone as well that day, and Minkkit and Nightkit had confirmed their love for their sister Honeykit. One could say it was a sort of calm before the storm, and it's still one of Nightshiver's favourite memories despite the sad feeling Honeykit's uncertainty gave.
Little less than a moon after, Minkkit, Honeykit and Bluebellkit had all gone missing without a trace.
Nightkit was worried about all of them, and knew her mother surely was too. Not to mention how lonely she was without her only friend and siblings. So, one very early morning, Nightkit decided to gather whatever courage she had and go look for them. She escaped through a small hole in the nursery that hadn't been patched up properly, and went on her search.
Unfortunately, her search didn't go very well. She had just left the territory and was in the outskirts, the sun now hanging high above, when she heard a sound. She thought it was one of her siblings, or her friend, but no. It was who she'd later refer to as "him". A unkept looking black and white tom, with bright crazy green eyes and very strange, unusual breathing was what she found instead - or rather, he found her. Nightshiver doesn't remember very well what happened that day, but she felt like prey being played with before getting killed and eaten. It was thanks to her mother who'd gone out looking for her and unknowingly distracted the tom by calling her, that Nightkit was able to escape between his paws right before his attack. She reunited with her mom, the tom following only for a moment, as he'd certainly wanted to avoid getting discovered. It didn't end there however, as both Nightkit and her mother ended up getting kidnapped by twolegs.
(See This).
About half a moon later is when they were finally able to return to camp, Nightkit's nightmares only having gotten more frequent since the incident, and feeling even more shaken up than before. There was still no sign of her friend or siblings either, and things seemed to be looking rather down until, close to her apprenticeship, Nightkit met Jaykit who would soon become her closest friend.
XX As an apprentice they...
At roughly six moons of age, alongside Ebonypaw, Mirepaw, and Duskpaw, Nightpaw became and apprentice. But in terms of siblings or friends? She was all alone. Nightpaw was assigned Stormlily as her mentor, to her a luck, a kind molly who's mate she by chance had met about a moon prior to her apprenticeship.
Stormlily was kind, and so it didn't take too long for Nightpaw to feel more comfortable around her. One of the first things she remembers doing with Stormlily as a new apprentice was play 'Hide and go Sniff', a game in which one cat hides, and the other has to sniff them out. Nowadays, Nightshiver likes to play that game with any new apprentice she gets, just like her mentor had with her.
Although not everything was easy, Nighpaw soon managed to get the theory of hunting down. Unfortunately, by that time, her mother had gone missing, leaving her with no family or even friends in the clan as Jaykit had disappeared too. Although she worried for her friend, all she really wanted was her mother to return safely from wherever she was.
Soon enough, her first gathering came around. Nightpaw was extremely nevous and didn't pay much attention to where she was going when she bumped into a white tom by the name of Frostpaw. Apparently, the tom had recently joined ShadowClan from ThunderClan. Despite her being nervous and him not being all that welcoming compared to how Stormlily had been, the two talked during the gathering and one night of moon watching together following the said gathering, Nightpaw had made what would soon become her closest friend next to Jaykit, of whom she still hadn't heard anything by that time.
After meeting Frostpaw, things seemed to be looking up again, despite her mother's disappearance and growing tensions with ThunderClan. But much to her dismay, these tensions eventually led to ShadowClan being send to raid the clan of Thunder. Nightpaw didn't exactly agree with this decision, which was one of the reasons why she was relieved she didn't have to partake in the raid due to not having had any battle training.
Still, after the battle when everyone came back to the clan, Nightpaw felt obligated to try and help in any way. Even if she hadn't been in favour of the raid, her clanmates were injured and she wanted to help. That's when she first truly met Irisflame, who send her out to gather Dandelion and Marigold. her mentor having gone to find her and not being too injured, was able to help Nightpaw with her herb-hunt for Irisflame.
After the battle, Jaykit came back - only to ask her to bring him to RiverClan so he could 'steal' his sister back, as she'd supposedly been kidnapped by them. Nightpaw refused, worried for her friend's safety, but felt like it left a sour end to the last conversation they would have in a while, as Jaykit would disappear again, leaving Nightpaw more worried than before.
Very soon after ShadowClan's raid on ThunderClan, RiverClan, once again, came and raided ShadowClan. The event left Nightpaw in a great state of fear as it reminded her of the first time they raided them, and still having no battle training, she had no means to defend herself. Nightpaw was being pushed around left and right by the fighting, unable to escape their mids. Her mother had just returned, and once she realised so, she wanted to get to her. Luckily, her friend Frostpaw was there to help her get out of between the fighting, and to her mother, something she would always appreciate.
Once the fighting was finally over, feeling useless due to how she couldn't fend for herself and even needed to be saved, Nightpaw once again asked to help Irisflame in any way she could. That time, she was surprised by a sudden embrace from the medicine cat, and was allowed to help again by quenching the bleeding injury of a warrior named Bloodtooth. During his healing process, he'd started small talk with Nightpaw, soon making his judgemental thoughts about Nightpaw's mentor and her current training status clear, once he found out she hadn't had any battle training yet. It was when Irisflame came to her defence in that situation, that Nightpaw really started to see her as a something more of a friend and friendly face among the clan, rather than just the later and their medicine cat.
And after everything that happened in the little bit over a half-moon after the beginning of her apprenticeship, Nightpaw had a fun outing with Frostpaw in the territory, accompanied by a funny warrior named Fallenheart. While the warrior was who knew where, the two apprentices played her favourite game of hide and go sniff, going hunting following that. Nightpaw caught a supposedly deaf mouse, and after a successful hunt together, they went looking for, and eventually found, Fallenheart who they'd lost to chasing a squirrel. Later on, she was also able to help the at the time deputy Beastspark and Frostpaw in fixing up the elder's den. She hadn't done so before, but did previously watch how the nursery had been patched up when she was a kit, thanks to which she had a pretty good idea of how to go about it. Overall, both of those were a fun experience and one of Nightpaw's fondest memories.
But those times didn't last very long, as it had finally gotten time for her to start battle training. And seen everything that had happened, it was long due. Battle training is what Nightpaw feared out of being an apprentice, as she'd come to greatly dislike fighting for how violent it always was and how scared it made her feel. But ultimately, she had to go through it.
Despite the tensions remaining all around her, Nightpaw's training proceeded a bit more smoothly than before, now that there weren't any raids happening. She got to discover that her semi self taught ability to sneak was something typically ShadowClan, like ThunderClan and climbing trees, and after a clan-wide training session in just that, which left her with some nightmares, she met Doepaw, an apprentice who was also originally from ThunderClan and would become a very close friend of Frostpaw.
Eventually, after everything, Nightpaw hit the ten moon mark. Exactly as she did, however, Icestar had come to inquire Storlily and Nightpaw about her readiness for her assessment, despite her technically being two moons too young. To Nightpaw's luck, Stormlily was able to buy her some time by requesting one last Battle Training session. She too knew about Nightpaw's near incapability to fight another, and quite frankly Nightpaw was worried about the new requirement as well. She didn't think herself ready for her assessment so soon, let alone to spar the leader, but clearly Icestar was impatient due to the need of new warriors and only increasing amount of apprentices.
Some could say it was a form of luck, but to her it felt more like a curse. Even before this 'last battle training session' could be done, WindClan came along and attacked ShadoClan's camp. But this wasn't just like any other raid - they were there to drive them out. As usual Nightpaw was terrified and nearly unable to do anything, when she got caught in having to face a younger but more skilled WindClan apprentice: Crowpaw.
This specific apprentice she had to face, sounded extremely similar in his breathing to the tom that had traumatised her as a kit. This left her even more afraid than she'd already been, and no sooner did the tom dig his claws into her shoulders, her pulling to get loose only worsened the injury - all she had done in 'defence' being a small, thin scratch to his face while trying to get loose, followed by an accidental fall from tripping over her own paws. She would've hoped that was all, but that wasn't the case. The WindClan apprentices' mentor seemed to deem it a good idea to get involved, and right as she managed to get back up, jumped onto her back, worsening her shoulder injuries by digging his claws in right there and his weight causing her to fall again. It was a surprise to her when it seemed that Crowpaw removed his mentor from her himself, almost thinking he was letting her go, only to get bit in the ear by him while being given a long and painful scar along her side. Only then had she been left to obey the orders of retreatment, but not before she slashed the other apprentice's tail in a strange and unusual fit of rage that she scared herself with.
With ShadowClan retreating in a loss, it marked the end of the battle. Nightpaw was feeling terrified, feeling like 'he' was watching her, ready to attack and terrorise her at any given moment, especially now that they were heading into unknown territory. The injuries she had gotten, specifically the ones on her shoulders, made it hard for her to walk and follow the rest of the clan too. Luckily, Fallenheart had taken notice of her, and kept by her side as they slowly went to ShadowClan's temporary refuge. There, he was even willing to keep her company as she was too afraid to be alone. Nightpaw would forever be grateful to him for doing so, as although she was of course still scared, not being alone helped.
While they were there, however, upon a meeting being called right after their arrival, Nightpaw was almost convinced she was going to get exiled for not defending her clan properly. She was almost certain of it, when instead Icestar would be making her, among others, a warrior at that very meeting, right after being driven out. The battle had counted as an assessment.
At ten moons of age, alongside her friend Frostpaw, who would be renamed Talonstone, his friend Doepaw, who would be named Doetuft, and lastly Ebonypaw, who she had her apprentice ceremony with and would be named Ebonyfang and the new medicine cat apprentice, Nightpaw somehow became Nightshiver, honoured not by StarClan, but by her clan, for her Empathy and Sensitivity.
Some of the first and last words Icestar had for Nightpaw specifically, other than her warrior name giving after, was "I did say if you were fit to do so,". Reason for that sentence was that the leader knew many were injured, and wouldn't reprimand anyone for not stepping up for that reason. Nightpaw had stepped up, however, but right before the leader could get to her, she fell during the warrior ceremony due to the pain and her shoulders not being able to support her weight any longer. It then took two failed attempts to get up from the ground before she was finally upright again, but not without having to sit to relief some of the weight. There was nothing she could do about it though, and got her warrior name that day.
XX As a warrior they...
After she became a warrior, Night had a bit of a heart-to-heart, though unfinished, with Irisflame (here) during her healing. She also saw her mother, Fawnpetal, for a last time who stayed around until Shc found a new camp, and helping Night to it. There, once her injuries got a bit better, she had a first introduction to swimming through Talonstone (+learned basic climbing and was supposed to officially meet/befriend Doetuft, all on different occasions). Nonetheless however, she remained afraid and feeling uneasy for a long time as she felt like 'he' was watching her. Despite all that however, she then got her first apprentice, Brackenpaw, a recently joined outsider who is now Brackenfire. Although she still struggled to meet new cats, Night soon enough found joy in spending time with Brackenpaw, wanting to teach her whatever she knew, but worried about battle training. She felt incapable to teach that due to a seeming incapability to fight. She went on some patrols, herb patrols, helped gather supplies for leafbare and fortify camp. Overall, slowly working through her fears of the new area, everything seemed fairly uneventful. Until one point where another cat got killed infront of the clan (the reason I don't remember) it shook her up a bit but she managed to recover from it mostly. Life continued normally -- she completed her long made promise with Talonstone to teach him how to make snowcats if he taught her how to swim. Then things started to go downhill when she ran into Crowpaw again - then turned Crowtooth. The meeting shook her up and around the same time her apprentice went missing as well as a brawl between Shc and Wc breaking out at the gathering. She managed to stay out of the fighting, but remained shaken up and worried for her apprentice (she also met Wolfwhisper somewhere along the line, who for a moment did manage to amuse her). After some time, still worried for her apprentice, Nightshiver was suddenly assigned a new one: Pinepaw. Unfortunately, she disappeared shortly after. Twolegs were near the border who caught her as she didn't want to risk leading them back to camp. She quickly realised these twolegs were awful as they mistreated and very underfed her and every other cat they held captive. Not every cat was as nice either however, one of which ended up being the father of her kits. This event has instilled a growing fear in face of twolegs - more so than before. Only once she finally managed to somehow escape and find her way back to Shc, did she find out she was pregnant (after happily being reunited with her apprentice, now Brackenfire - here. She also met Doekit, who was like a first introduction to motherhood - here ). She joined as a queen in the nursery but kept having a bad feeling concerning it all. Stonedawn, and old acquaintance/friendly face was one of the very few, and first ine, who came to visit her during that time not long before her due date here. The two became quick friends. Night was also visited by her mother in a dream, where discover Fawnpetal had since died (here). Once the kits were born, none were alive. She named them Minkkit (as that one resembled her brother), Hopekit and Peacekit respectively but didn't have it in her to tell the clan. So, she went out herself late at night not long after having them to bury them, with the help of Stonedawn who happened upon her - a comfort in the end as he also could keep the secret as she wanted (here TW for mention of Death and Stillbirth). After burying them, they happened upon Bunnykit, a very young kitten who Stonedawn revealed to be his kit with an outsider. But she was abandoned, so although hesitant, Nightshiver agreed to take care of/nurse her, not being able to leave her to her fate and feeling she should at least do something to thank Stonedawn for everything. (She also got called out for her stutter by Dawnstar during the joining, where she dared explain she was born with it and couldn't stop it. But said she would work on it ;; also said the kit would adopted by Stone and her as it's a strange friends taking care of a kit/practically fake mates limbo situation in the future). Despite not wanting to grow too close to her as she doesn't believe herself entitled to, she still feels a certain responsibility and care for her now that Night doesn't quite dare to give in to but also can't help. Not long after finding Bunnykit, Nightshiver found her old apprentice Brackenfire had gotten her own kits. Unfortunately, Brackenfire's milk did not come which led to Night offering to nursing the kits for as long as needed - which she would then do. She keeps her distance once again as the parenting is up to Bracken, but tries help her wherever she can and can't help the extra eye she holds on the kits as she easily notices them around camp and the nursery. Although Night still struggles to eat well, she is forcing herself to work on getting back to a better and consistent eating pattern as she came to realise it to be vital to milk production to feed the little ones. Now with the evacuation going on, old fears resurface and newfound worry for these kits (see this). Still she keeps hoping and praying everything will be okay, and her more motherly side slowly surfacing.